We’re only a few days into January and already the air is full of messages urging diet this and detox that.
It’s easy to feel the tug. Who wouldn’t? After a season of celebrations and rich food, many of us feel a little spent. But there are other ways to respond, and I’d like to offer an alternative to self-punishment.
Instead of diving headfirst into communal guilt, shame, restrictive eating, or fanciful cleanses that usually lead to a backlash, consider directing that vast amount of time, energy, and brainpower toward making peace with food and with your body.
It’s a revolutionary approach.
I don’t think anyone who’s passionate about food—reading cooking blogs or writing one—has a completely carefree relationship with food and body image. Many of us start food blogs, in part, to make sense of that relationship; I know I did.
It’s hardly surprising. We live in deeply body-obsessed societies that promote impossible standards to measure ourselves against. French women, despite their global reputation for effortless elegance, are not immune. I can’t recall a time after childhood when I was fully at ease with my body. Do you?
The obsession shows up differently across cultures, but it’s so profound and so internalized that few people challenge it.
In recent years I’ve grown more aware of how I inhabit my body and how my surroundings—online and off—shape my thinking. Body positivity and unconditional self-acceptance are radical ideas, and I’m fully on board.
The Illusionists: A documentary about the marketing of unattainable beauty around the world.
Instead of a detox, how about this
To be the change I want to see, here are my thoughts on detoxing and how to guard yourself against the constant message that you need to fix yourself. Consider these alternatives:
YES to acknowledging that the holidays are also about food, and that depending on your history and social circle, it’s likely you ate more than you needed or wanted.
YES to being okay with the imperfect choices you made.
YES to tuning into your body’s cues after a period of richer meals—eat mindfully most of the time, honor your hunger most of the time, and notice satiety most of the time.
YES to seeking foods that make your taste buds sing and make you feel energized, rather than choosing foods to feel virtuous or “clean.” For many of us this means fresh, colorful whole foods prepared simply—typically the kinds of recipes shared here—but do what feels right for you.
NO to measuring your self-worth by how much kale you eat or how many fries you skip.
YES to finding a practice of self-knowledge that helps you process emotions—meditation, podcasts, faith, or therapy. Food is rarely the core issue; it’s what food represents for you.
OKAY to short-term “cleanses” or “nutritional resets” if you’re trying to untangle emotional ties to certain foods, identify sensitivities, or address digestive issues. Even then, proceed with caution.
NO if the cleanse is a socially acceptable way to restrict calories or pay penance for “bad” choices. Only you can know the difference deep down.
OKAY to searching for “detox” or “clean eating” recipes to find produce-driven, wholesome meals that excite you. NO to recipes that rely on images of airbrushed models or promise extreme weight loss from a single drink.
YES to a social media detox—unfollow, mute, or unfriend accounts whose highlight reels make you feel inadequate. Consider letting subscriptions lapse for magazines that uphold a single body ideal, and instead expose yourself to images of everyday people in diverse shapes, sizes, and colors.
YES to opting out of diet talk and withholding judgment about what others eat or how they look. A simple habit is to notice one thing you like about someone—a scarf, a smile, a stride—which can brighten your day and shift your focus outward.
YES to moving your body in ways that feel joyful rather than punitive.
YES to showing up as yourself—unapologetically and without shame—because you are enough.
This isn’t easy. Being genuinely okay with yourself goes against cultural grain and takes deliberate daily practice to undo years of conditioning. But it’s possible, and once it changes, it feels like a switch you can’t—and wouldn’t want to—flip back. The relief is palpable and life feels lighter.
Sharing, reading, listening
If this resonates, please share this post with a friend who might benefit.
For further reading and resources, consider books and podcasts that explore intuitive eating, emotional relationships with food, and body acceptance. These resources can offer tools to help you rethink food, thought patterns, and self-image.
*If “self-love” sounds like romantic adoration and feels uncomfortable or narcissistic, understand it differently: the kind of love we mean here is like the care you have for a child, a close friend, or a sibling—deep, tender, and unconditional.
This post was first published in January 2017 and updated in January 2018.